


You Are My Sunshine

by yellow_canary



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Sara's Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26523295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yellow_canary/pseuds/yellow_canary
Summary: Sara is Nyssa's sunshine, but the sun doesn't always shine for her.
Relationships: Nyssa al Ghul/Sara Lance
Kudos: 26





	You Are My Sunshine

The League is death, it is darkness and it is the world of the devil, but Sara lives in it. She a part of her felt that after everything she's done, cheating with her sister's boyfriend, torturing men on the Amazo, and creating the monster of Mirakuru, this is what she deserves. They try to pull the wool over her eyes, tell her a line and have her repeat it back, but she never bought into the myths and legends of doing all right by killing in the shadows.

Sara let the water run over her hands as she scrubbed out the dried blood from underneath her fingernails. Some days it felt like it would never wash away, but today it does. When she finally saw the white of her nails and rinsed them off, drying them on the soft towel.

Yet there was happiness, in the form of a beautiful brunette who kissed her like no one else, who loved her truly, more than anyone else ever had. To Nyssa, Sara wasn't her second choice, and Sara didn't have to steal her away from anyone. Nyssa was hers by choice and for love. 

Sara walked on her toes as she left the bathroom. It was late, but a few candles still burned around their room, forever providing light against the dark and the cold night outside their windows. Sara slipped under the covers and propped herself up on her elbows as she gazed down at Nyssa asleep before her. Nyssa’s black curls were a halo on her pillow and her lips were slightly parted as she slept. She was so beautiful, and wonderful, and everything good about the League. Nyssa was the bright spot in everything.

“You are my sunshine,” Sara whisper pressing her lips to Nyssa’s head. She can only remember a few lines from the childhood song, but it comes back to her like a soft memory.

“You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine,

You make me happy,

When skies are gray,

You'll never know dear, how much I love you,

So please don't take my sunshine away.”

As Sara trailed off, she wrapped her arms around Nyssa's waist and cuddled into her chest. Sara held her as if Nyssa would disappear like so many others had and Sara would never be convinced that this was permanent. So for now, she just squeezed Nyssa tighter and prayed that she'd still be there in the morning.

* * *

Nyssa learned the song from Sara’s lips. She sang it only when Sara thought Nyssa was sleeping. The simple tune was a melody that floated off of Sara’s lips, it was childish, but beautiful. Nyssa couldn't help, but think of the song in reverse, with Sara’s yellow hair, musical laugh, and shining smile it reminded her remarkably of the sun. Sara was a warm and happy spot in Nyssa’s life, filled with duty, honor, and obedience. Sara was her joy and her happiness. 

Nyssa can see how the darkness of their life affected Sara, taking away the glow of her hair and the brightness of her smile. Sara fell asleep crying in her arms for the little girl whose father she killed. For all the regret and anger Sara felts, for a commitment she has made that asked her to kill. Nyssa knew that it didn’t settle well in Sara's heart, even Nyssa was beginning to question whether what they were doing was right. Sara had always had a better moral compass than to her and if this tipped her scales towards the wrong, then Nyssa felt right to question it. 

Sara's sobs turn into heavy breaths and shaking moans, until she finally drifted into a deep slumber. Nyssa took a warm cloth and washed away the saltwater from her cheeks. Then she tucked Sara further into bed and held her close. The words to Sara’s song floated into her mind. Nyssa had never been one for singing, but she did her best to sing softly, for Sara.

“You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine,

You make me happy,

When skies are gray, 

You'll never know dear, how much I love you,

So please don't take my sunshine away.”

Nyssa knew that Sara had never been as committed to the League as most of the others are. She knew that she was the reason Sara stayed and there's a part, deep inside her, that knew that one day, that won't be enough. 

* * *

Nyssa was right and one day it's not enough, Sara packed a light bag and dressed while Nyssa was out. Sara knew she wouldn't be able to walk away from Nyssa if she were there. So she left in the dead of night while Nyssa was in a meeting with her father. She took the dirt bike across the desert towards Baghdad. Sara looked up at the sky with no moon to reflect the sun’s light. She's turning away from her sunshine, but a part of her is still naive enough to think and maybe they will be together again someday. 

That day came when Sara willingly returned to the League, she had a new understanding of death and its necessity, but also on her role in taking a life for the League. If it meant her family and her City's survival then Sara would willingly serve Ra's al Ghul. Nyssa in all her grace forgave her. There was an understanding in her voice as she spoke with her and she was happy to have her back willingly. So for a brief time, there was sunshine for both of them.

* * *

Whenever Sara left on a mission without her, she seems to take the sunshine with her. Nyssa tried not to mope through the hall, but even Ra's al Ghul can sense her brooding. It was made worse when Sara failed to check in with her handler. Nyssa feared from the moment her father assigned this task to Sara, that her sunshine would be taken from her. A fear that settled heavy on her heart as she kneeled in front of Sara's Grave where her Beloved was buried. Her Sunshine is gone forever and Nyssa held back tears as she spoke with Laurel. It was only when she was back in the safety of Sara safe house that she leaned against the table and let her tears fall. 

A few years ago she looked up the lyrics to Sara's sunshine song and realized the sad nature of the full song. The lyrics come back to her now as she cried.

“The other night dear, as I lay sleeping

I dreamed I held you in my arms,

But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken,

So I hung my head and I cried,

You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine,

You make me happy,

When skies are gray, 

You'll never know dear, how much I love you,

So please don't take my sunshine away.”

Someone took her sunshine away, but she would take the sun from them, permanently.

* * *

But the song was wrong and her sunshine came back to her.

Nyssa wrapped her arms around Sara's waist as they sit in the porch swing on Felicity and Oliver's back deck. The sun shined warmly above them as they enjoyed the last few days of summer surrounded by friends and family. Laurel and Tommy sit at the table drinking and laughing with Felicity and Lyla. John and Oliver play with the kids in the yard and Quinton was at the barbecue showing Donna how to cook the steaks. 

Nyssa has never thought of loving anyone but Sara, but as they settle into their roles of aunts to the children of their friends, Nyssa felt her love open up a place in her heart for them and for their friends who have become her family. Sara was still her main sunshine and Sara looked at her like the sun shined in her eyes too. Sara leaned in and kissed her again, Sara's mouth warm and inviting as Nyssa put a hand on her neck and held her closer. They were both absolutely and blissfully happy.

Little Sara Diggle ran past and Sara scooped her into her arms, giggling as pulled away and ran off again. Little Sara came back and showed Sara the flower crown she was making. Sara pulled her up to sit in her lap and helped her tie the flowers together. Then she whispers and Little Sara's ear and she turned to place the crown on Nyssa's head. Sara held Little Sara close and sang to her.

“You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine,

You make me happy,

When skies are gray 

You'll never know dear, how much I love you,

So please don't take my sunshine away.”

Little Sara smiles up at both of them and as they rocked back and forth. Nyssa looked over at Sara and caught her staring. They both know that they will never have to live without Sunshine again. The sun was warm on their skin and it sparkles in their eyes forever. 


End file.
